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I’m 20 years old and will soon be discussing physical boundaries with a potential boyfriend, but kissing is one thing I’m not sure how to address.

While my answer to this question will likely surprise you, let me first start off by saying that I’m thankful to see a question like this pop up in my submission box for this Q&A series, because it’s yet another reminder that there are some really good people out there, wanting nothing less than to honor God with their lives and relationships. So to you who wrote in with this question – I just have to take a minute and say: way to go.

I thought that was old news, that we’d laid to rest the “I Kissed Dating Goodbye” era and moved on to new topics. Maybe you’ve noticed, but the Courtship movement has recently received some major attention from both national television and recent entertainment. I am not putting down the concept of courtship, and I never will.

As far as the Courtship movement is concerned, saying that you’re in a “dating” relationship is almost like declaring out loud that you’re living in sin.

The premise of the show revolves around virgins who are past their mid-twenties, either by circumstance or by choice.The couple abstained from every sexual activity, including kissing until marriage, and shared an uncomfortable first kiss at their wedding ceremony.“Virgin Diaries” brings to mind what choices teens and young adults today must make in their relationships, begging the question of what intimacy is appropriate for unwed Christian couples?The Bible says in Ephesians 5:3, “But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity…I’ll never forget that day, because it was something I hadn’t really heard of before.Yes, I grew up in the era where the “purity culture” was being preached from the rooftops, but all in all, the focus was always on not having sex before marriage.




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It was the only time in my life that I got depressed: poor sleep, suppressed appetite, Kafka. The next kiss didn't come for another 4 years, when I was in medical school. Turns out that the skill set required to navigate the tricky waters of romantic interaction wasn't in any book I had read or any class I had taken. As guys, a lot of what we did in physics and math class was to try to straighten crooked stuff out.